Work like you don't need the money.Love like you've never been hurt.Dance like no-one's watching.Sing like no-one's listening.Live like there's no tomorrow.

Friday 8 January 2010

'Twas ten minutes to midnight.....

'Twas ten minutes to midnight and all through the house
not a creature was stirring not even a mouse...
but wait.. what's that scrabbling? What is that sound?
and I looked for the source, but no source could be found?
Lying flat on my belly,in drifts of dog hair,
pulling out fridge, then freezer
but nothing was there?

Through the cat flap, cold wind whistled
and the snow storm it blew
as I lay on my stomach knowing not what to do!
The scratching continued and so did the nibbling
and the labrador just sat there, snuffling and dribbling.
Scrabbling turned to gnawing, as I searched with a light
but no pesky rodentine visitor popped into sight?

I know this seems ludicrous and at that hour it was
but my mind set to thinking as I staked out the darkness
what fiend shared our home, midst the chaos and madness?
Could it possibly be Jacko the Hamster that fled;
last Summer's birthday prezzie, presumed to be dead?
Had he lived all this time, around the back of the units
not chased by dear Frankie and chewed into two bits?

Huddled in icy,cold darkness
I decided next day, to phonecall for aid
quicksmart to Rentokil, no matter how much I paid
to rid my poor house of this troublesome scratching,
I d make cups of tea while some bloke did the catching!
"But Mum!" cried the offspring, "..it might be our pet?"
I replied "he's been gone for six months, hasn't bothered you yet?!"

When proved futile my hunting I staggered to bed
When I arose the next day, aha! What did I find
A large hole through the loaf and some crumbs left behind.
Grabbing Thompson's directory and a large cup of tea
I retired to my bed thinking "Why me, why me????"
Rentokil were summoned to come right away
before whiskers invited some friends round to play!

"What kind of exterminator do you think you will need?"
asked the lady from Rentokil scanning her selection
"Mice, rats, or cockroaches.. what kind of infection?"
"Hamsters?" I faltered feeling face flushing red
" I m sorry" she replied "I misheard what you said??"
"Jacko...a hamster...not the late King of Pop!"
In the silence you could have heard many a pin drop.

Then some coughing, muffled laughter
" I see..." said Ms Rentokil, voice loaded with derision
" I ll ask my manager... it will be his decision!"
Then silence and lift music as my plight was appraised
The Ms Rentokil returned with a voice , slighty raised
" Mrs Hieatt, our service does not extend to lost pets
perhaps you d be better off calling the Vets?"

So Jacko is still in his skirting board domain
while I search for someone who'll kill a pest, with a name!?
Whilst he chews through our electrics; the freezer ,the hob
I will keep hunting for the right man for the job?
Let this be a warning to to future pet buyers
Buy Alcatraz for hamsters, if you value your wires!

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